Anyone out there that is a good writter?

Now I know not much people are reading my blog but if by any chance anyone out there is a good 2D/3D Designer/Artist or a good story writer feel free to tell me since I am looking for someone to help me continue my idea the "Warfield" one.

Can't think right anymore.

So Friday I decided I would start listening to heroes thinking it would be just some other cool TV series since I love watching movies but it was much more then that.

I don't think there is any other TV series that can even come close to compare to heroes, it's simply too insane. The amounts of twist and trill that you get while watching this is just too much. So I watched the first one but it was so good I just ended watchings the whole 2 seasons in my weekend and now I'm going to watch season 3 tomorrow but it's not done yet. If you like TV series I'm telling you, you got to watch this it is seriously amazing but let me warn you, if you do watch the first episode make sure you are able to watch the rest because you won't be able to think about anything else for a while. Let me make this clear to you, I went into such a insane mood I couldn't do anything else but watch this show, it's THAT amazing.

Ever felt anxiety or fear toward a upcoming event? Well this is for you.

Ok so I just wish to post this because I realized another awesome thing today :)

So let's say you want to talk to a someone but you are really shy toward this person or that you have an event coming and you really don't know how you are gonna be able to prevent all the stress. Well first of all, this is probably not new for most of you, fear happen because of something that we don't know or something that MIGHT happen. You have fear because you feel you are NOT in control of the situation and that you might do something totally stupid because you won't be prepared toward what may happen.

Now this is what you should do, visualize the situation but not just visualize it the way you wish it would happen, note this could be a bonus but do not stop to that. Visualize yourself in the exact situation feel that you are there NOW and feel the stress FEEL THE FEAR that's right you have to FEEL your fear to fight it. Now once you are deep within your mind and start truly feeling anxiety like if you would really be there, try to think of what you should be doing, try many different options. Do it to a point where you start loosing fear of it because you are well aware of all the many ways the situation could turn out. What is it that you fear? That the person you love tells you no? That your friends make fun of you? That you get fired because you stand up against your boss?

Visualize the situation until you feel you already went over it and that the situation could come up at anytime and you would be ready to go toward it because you no longer fear since you know EVERYTHING that can happen, you are now more familiar with this situation that you haven't even faced yet then you are with situations that truly happened. Once you can go back to visualize the situation and feel you are truly doing and it, that you are experimenting it and that you are in control well now you successfully overcame your fear and this works for anything, fear not because fear is only something that happen when you aren't in control of the situation, BE IN CONTROL AND YOU WILL SUCCEED WITH ANYTHING.

I guess I lied, I did in fact finish one story

So I looked trough my story ideas and found out one I had done but the correction was never finished so I decided to finish it and it is 4 pages long, it's a World War 1 story I made for a friend, here it is.


The meaning of why I am


4th September 1917, My name is Garid , I am an American soldier , today is my last night before me and my brother of combats are going for the true war, even though this term is pretty wrongly used since they are mostly strangers to me. Everyone has its unique story, but yet it’s all the same, they either worked in a poor farm all their childhood or didn't do anything good in their life but overall it’s all the same thing. We are just a bunch of lone men who did a mistake and decided to die doing something good rather then doing nothing even though we might not even have a chance to defend ourselves.


As of my self, my mistake goes back when I was still a kid, I was 10 years old. It wasn't that of a sunny day it was raining actually but yet we were still outside me and my brother playing ball. Until he threw the ball at me and I started running at him to hit him since I was mad at him, but he got scared and ran in the roadway and the times of regrets began there, he got smashed by a car. That's right, I went to hit him but it seem like I even failed at this, since someone did it for me... He got strongly injured to the head and I went home running at my dad screaming, to call for help but it was way too late. He was bleeding from his skull it was a severe injury. Since this day nothing has been the same anymore. All our life, our parents always were encouraging ourselves and helping us to achieve our goal and to finish school. When I was young I wanted to become a musician, yet I failed at that too. My parents never ever encouraged me anymore, they just couldn't be able to help the kid that killed their own son. Not long after that my parents divorced, my mom went in another city and I stayed with my dad for 8 years and when I was old enough I left to live my own life. I never finished school I dropped out at 14, since my dad knew I could have never achieved
anything in life. I had no goal, I had nothing but regrets and I had a strong hatred for myself.


As time went on I tried working in some dirty boring job, but I couldn’t even do this right I would just fail, again. I was 21 and I decided that I was sick of this and even though I knew I couldn't achieve anything I should go somewhere where I could do something better then to just sit here and do nothing. So I got into the army in 1913. I never really cared for meeting new people, they would just look at me like I was odd and apart from others like if I was just not like them. I never mentioned to them why I decided to join the army so once they decided they had enough and they took my journal and they read it out loud and then burned it in front of my face. They found out my reason to being here and even though they didn't like me very well this made the situation even worse. All that crap lasted for about a year until the first World War started. Its’ then that things started to get real, couldn’t mess around anymore things were serious and US was getting prepared for the worst. Everyday step was a step closer to our death, for sure I didn't like my brothers in arms, but they were the ones who would either going to get me killed or keep me alive. I didn't even know why I was there to be honest, was it to fight for my country or for myself...


16th July 1917, it has been 3 years of intensive training and the war has just begun. Well, for us at least. The UK has been in war since a long time now and we were now prpaired for it, we were going to be the first Americans to be sent to the World War. I'll always remember that day, we woke up in the morning and there was one of our guys missing, he didn't want to die for a cause that wasn't his. He didn't go too far before he got caught by one of the soldiers and get back to the base, I didn't like him. Neither did I hate him, but because he tried to get away he got the worst shame someone can get. He got all his clothes burned and got forced to return to his home naked... And we all knew that this was just an advertisement, we weren't allowed to fear we were meant to die for our country and at all cost.


And that's were we are now, tomorrow will be the real thing, I take a close look at all the brothers I am with knowing that tomorrow ill probably die or they will , but no matter what happened I know that not even half of us is going to make it. I might never really got to know them but they are still humans like me, just like the one I'm going to have to fight against today, I'll like to leave a note for you brother, I apologize for what I did but I'm soon going to get the same fate as you did 14 years ago, a fate that should of been mine...


Here I am in the trenches.......waiting to die, after the night of the 4th September 1917 We embarked north, the German army was well prepared for any incoming enemies. We are sent right into the core of the battlefield, some airplanes don't even have time to land. They get destroyed by these bastards. I got lucky since I didn't get affected, I saw the face of one of these guys from my regiment before he crashed, and it was terrible, all these years of training and he couldn't even make anything of it, no chance of fighting back. I used my parachute to jump off safely and I didn't get hurt while in the air I would see people literally get shot in the air, the mission was pure failure. We didn’t even start to attack that more then half of us were dead. As soon as I got on the battlefield I started running for a place to hide, like a coward you could say but what else could I have done... I waited several hours for all the guns to stop blazing and silently we were regrouping ourselves, with the few survivors stuck behind trenches. Since we were going to die for sure and that it was no point to wait any longer, they decided to move further but I stayed there hiding my self like the coward I am, or maybe I just didn’t wanted to die even though I deserved it? I was waiting in my rat hole hearing my fellow brothers die, they knew they had no chances of surviving. Two or tree people stayed there with me and we were the only ones knows left, no radio left and the enemy getting ready to dominate us. I decided I had to make my own way, I was moving slowly, while being prone on the ground. I kept moving all the way to the end of the trenches till I got away in a deep forest. There was really no where to go, and as I keep walking slowly I arrived to a nomad land, dead bodies everywhere and much of them were from the main group I guess other were mostly American too, our second regiment that was sent after us perished. There was really NO where to go and I had just abandoned the only ones I knew. I was scared, I knew if I would move further I would have probably got killed so I decided to find a safe spot to rest for the night.


When I woke up there was an enemy’s patrols scouting the area, I swear this was the scariest moment of my life. My heart was beating so fast it looked like it wasn't beating at all. Prone under a tree with the bright sun all around with this guy scouting, I couldn't get out, it was either stay there or gets shot and die from running away. But he was getting closer and closer and when you hear these weird German voices coming near you, you really freak out. But suddenly another German was taking back a prisoner, it was one of those only guys that stayed in the trenches with the few ones left. That German soldier that was getting close to me suddenly shouted something and took a walk back in the direction of this prisoner. He didn't only took out his gun and finish him right off, he kicked him in the face, breaking his tooth’s and shot him with his pistol in the stomach, slowly killing him. I was about to cry out loud from what I was actually watching. But that would have only resulted in me getting the same fate, probably worse. To finish him he held his breath since he couldn't move anymore. I was there passively looking at a solider I was with the night before and a few hours later he get killed while I watch him without any worries.

I needed to eat and drink but any movement would only get me caught. If I was to stay there with such a hot temperature it wasn't the Axis who were going to kill me, it would have been myself from not drinking anything. So either stay there or I die or I go out and get killed. But I preferred a quick death with a gunshot then a very slow suffering one. So as soon as those guys walked away I started to run but they heard noise and knew it wasn't one of them, they started the alarms and was going straight, straight for me......



I was running even though I couldn't afford to fight anymore, I was weak no energy at all, but there were Axis going for me and I just couldn't let them get me. It might just be a feeling that it wasn't my time to die yet or maybe my survival instincts, but I was definitely not ready to die. Yet I wasn't unarmed and so I decided the time was now set to fight, if I would have kept running like this I would of died no matter what. So I crouched and waited under grass and I could hear the Axis running for me. They were really in to get me, they were all scouting in solo, I saw one coming out of the brush and I took my hatred and my rifle and shot at him. And he went straight down and suddenly 2 other were coming for me. 1 in my back and one in front, I started running away and I nearly had a blind shot since I couldn't see him but I heard him just as he heard me. I shot but as I got him he got me too.


I shot him in the neck but he had gotten me to the left arm. I was critically injured and the other soldier saw me, but as he shot I had gotten time to reach the other side of the bush. He was the only one left but I was very injured, I took another blind guess and threw a grenade, knowing that this would cause even more people to be alarmed. And I don't know if it got him or if he just got injured but he gave me enough time to take this other soldier's pistol and run away. That damn soldier who killed my brother in arm, I was holding the same pistol that killed him. I was injured and I needed medics but I was left alone in those Axis fields. No radio, no way to contact anyone, I only had few rations, even if I would make it alive which was almost impossible, everyone thought I was dead, no one would come to rescue me. I took a nap and continued to walk even though I was injured, I put a little patch that stopped my blood from flooding but that was about the only thing I been able to do. I couldn't hold my rifle anymore so I was resigned to the only use of my pistol, it was useless to carry my rifle so I dropped it, yet this lead place to those Germans to find my way back, even though it was in the bush they could of retrieve it if they followed my path, and they would find me. It’s pretty hard to make a decision of where to go when your entire unit has been killed and you are stuck in the enemy fields. I decided that I had to try and retrieve a possible regiment of my country which even if I could of done it they could just shoot at me without looking if I was an Axis or not. But I had to try. It was getting late in the afternoon and I needed to sleep for the whole night.



I was still not able to use my left arm anymore but I was still able to use my pistol, I dropped everything but my rations and some ammunitions. I went straight toward and only moving the safest I could. But it was worst then a jungle, and I then started to hear noises of guns and I headed straight in that direction. I took a chance if there were noises coming from the Germans that would mean that they were probably fighting some American or well, enemies. It was my only chance. I started walking in the direction of the noise but once I arrived near enough I realized they were indeed shooting at their enemy but it wasn’t a regiment or anything it was prisoners. I had gotten my self right in their base only to get shoot too, and since there were plenty of snipers around they started the alerts. I was tired and hurt I did my best to run away but I didn't have enough luck this time, I fall on a dead tree and hurt my knee, I couldn't run anymore and these guys were coming for me.


Yet they caught me, and there was nothing I could do, they knew what I just saw and they thought about giving me the same fate. I was a prisoner for them now. All this fighting only to end in a prison, I abandoned my brothers, I killed my enemies that I didn't even have anything against them, I did all that to defend my self, what was the point of this survival instinct after all. Well it seem, it was now time for me to die. They caught me and brought me into a prison for days with nothing but nasty water and food. They wanted to know how I made it there, some other prisoner was translating the stuff they were saying so I could understand. I was stuck there for a month but since I didn't tell them anything and their torture wouldn't work, they decided to put me in the dead room, where there was nothing but dead bodies , no food , nothing but dead corpses. I was left there until I got sick from not eating, there was no way out, the only light I had was the light left from under the door. I counted the corpses and there were 36, it smelt very, very bad. Out of all theses dead corpse the only thing I found was one of theses soldiers’ journal, it was an English soldier from France, I read his entire journal, and he had a wife and 2 daughters waiting for him at home, yet he will never see them back. All I had to get out of this place was a paper and a little pencil. How could this get me out of here? Well, after thinking and trying to find out a way to get out of here, I found it, this journal is my escape, this is what I did. Here I am brother, I hope that once I come back home, you can forgive me for what I have done and maybe we can finish this ball game... Forgive me brother, forgive me...Derek.

A bit more about me.

Well I came to the conclusion that if you are to visit someone's blog you want to know what this person do, how he think and who he is, so here. I love to writes stories and I think about a lot of possibles movies I would create or book I could publishes, yet I don't post it here because I feel it is too good to risk getting it stolen and have it finished my someone else. I have no finished products but I have one I been working on for a year now, at first it was supposed to be a movie but I decided it would be much easier if I would have success with my book and then I would have a easy time turning this book into a movie, considering it would be a success. Pretty much it takes place in future since I am a lot into sci-phy and suspense and the name of it is Warfield and that's all you'll get for now :P

Welcome to my blog.

Sup,hmm a bit about me... Let's see I'm 19 I speak French and I am from Quebec and now you may ask yourself why do I write in English well because I find I am much more familiar with talking in english then french despite the way I may express my self in english.

I plan on writing about some music and might even add some shorts stories but hey that's what a blog is all about right.